It has been awhile since I have done an “open source coaching” post. These have been some of my very favorite times on the blog, since the advice from my readers is so specific and supportive.
Past posts include:
The 23 year old ballplayer trapped in a cube and the follow up post with input from his mom
Relationship advice for an aspiring entrepreneur
This time around, my gentle reader is, in her words, trapped in a hellish situation and wants to find a way out. Here is the gist, edited for confidentiality.
We decided that “Manic Mathilda” was an appropriate moniker, or just “Mathilda” for short.
Her message:
The axe has fallen here in my corner of Cubicle Nation. Twenty five people lost their jobs this morning.
I’m still here, and was just informed that yet another full-time job is being added to my plate. Plus, my direct report was axed, so her responsibilities are now mine too.
So I now have three official, stated, known full-time jobs. Yes, seriously.
I want to be focused on getting my new venture up and running so I can ESCAPE this place.
And now I have three full-time jobs. Plus, my Significant Other is away now and I have that annoying perfectionist in my head telling me I’m going to fail at everything because there’s no way to get everything done perfectly.
I really want to kill that little perfectionist in my head. But I’ve heard that self-inflicted brain surgery is generally a bad idea, resulting in coma and/or death.
Big breath.
Damn.
My immediate suggestion was to push back on taking on three people’s jobs, since that would be physically impossible. She said that she had talked to her manager, who told her it was going to be necessary to work 60-80 hour weeks for awhile. This did not sit well.
What is your best advice for Mathilda? She is not in a financial situation where she can go without working, and her budding business idea will still take some work to get up and profitable.
Bring it on smart readers, your best thinking is much appreciated!
Rent the movie Office Space.
Then Quit. Use the power of desperation to do what you love. and maybe make money at it.
Screw corporate Murica and what they want you to believe (and apparently have plenty of people in these comments believing) about what you have to do to get ahead. Serve them? For what? Maybe next week they’ll find some green kid out of school who will do those three jobs for 2/3 the pay you require. Think they’ll hesitate to get rid of you?
Corporate life is not life, it is death. It is not organic, it is not healthy, someday maybe humans will evolve out of it. For now, use this experience as a zen wake-up bell. Ding! and get out NOW.
I agree to prioritise is the key. But I disagree to ask the ’employer’ (or direct line manager) to prioritise the tasks/responsibilities from post-it notes, 5 max, FIFO style. Prioritise YOURSELF, then inform your manager of your plan on how to cope, and try get some guidelines on how he sees the big lines. You are in the end in the same boat, and your manager is also freaked out wondering how to handle this, so your proactive help is essential; you’ll just both have to learn to do more with less, a usual request in any industry anyway.
The real question is probably HOW to prioritise. Good news: less people also means less interfaces thus less meetings. Good time to consolidate them from the 3 jobs and make them more efficient (try standup meetings, always faster). Then try focus on what makes a difference in the long term. What is burning is most likely already too late anyway.
Finally view this as a learning opportunity, not a chore.. Good luck
80 hours a week? Nobody would accept or even require such thing in Europe. What happpend to you, America? Very sad story.
Lots of fantastic advice & posts –
One more additional thought that I didn’t see written –
Don’t know if your intended Future Venture has applicability to current company but, when you do move forward w/ your entrepreneurial thing, this dysfunctional company could be one of your first clients.
I agree w/ all the prioritization advice. But, also see if while balancing those 3 jobs, you learn more re: what this company values, what positions they’re retaining and how you might “package” your entrepreneurial services when the time comes.
(I am assuming there’s a connection between what your current work is and what you dream of in future)
Asserting yourself in managing these tasks will be a good practice for pitching this company as a client, if that’s a possibility that you see in the future.
Even if the next round of layoffs get you, you may be laying good groundwork for future consulting. If you handle this as many people have advised, you are building up your entrepreneurial & consulting skills.
Good luck!
Mathilda, I see lots of good advice about prioritizing and bringing that list to the boss. That is great advice but have a more radical approach that might just get you going on your own business venture faster.
How about starting your own consulting company today?
Take your current hourly rate and triple it to cover insurance, benefits and well deserved raise. Let you boss know you are going out on your own and would be happy to work all the hours they would like as a contractor. If they give you 80 hours a week, you can do the work and not be financially exploited. With 80 hours you can stockpile tons of cash. On the other hand if they only give you 20 hours you would be making close to what you are making now and you would have time to work on you own venture. I think it is a Win/Win either way.
Keep in contact with everyone that was laid off and let them know what you are doing and available for other consulting jobs.
Hopefully this is a positive spin on Mathilda’s situation: Starting your own venture / business is probably like working three full-time jobs anyway (if not more), so perhaps you can learn from this experience (how you work under pressure, how you handle three different jobs, how you have to communicate with different parties in different roles, how you schedule and prioritize work, etc.). In the process you may learn a lot about yourself and what works for you and what doesn’t.
I would recommend her to check out resources for being an entrepreneur. I know that FiredNetwork (www.FiredNetwork.com) has a lot of them, plus it includes the ability to get “FiredUp” with people in similar situations.
There are many ways to deal with this horrendous (tho sadly common) situation. Other posts here are full of excellent advice for managing the new job. But let’s look at your stated goal: “I want to be focused on getting my new venture up and running so I can ESCAPE this place.” That means the three jobs on your plate are purely a means to an end.
First, figure out what elements of this super job matter to your new venture- connections to make, conferences to attend, skills to learn- and work on those areas. That way when you work 60-80 hours you’ll get more than a paycheck and bloodshot eyes.
Second, remember that everyone is over worked just like you- they won’t have time to care about all of your responsibilities either. Everyone is working on Plan B; you should work on your B-plan.
Third, and most important, remember that this job doesn’t love you. It doesn’t care about your dreams or what you are having for dinner. This job cares about itself. You need to care about you.
Enough of the sermon! Good luck.
Mario – because the comment I quoted has Mathilda deciding on her own and letting her boss in on it.. maybe. If, you know, she feels he’s up to it. My point is that it’s perfectly fine to have the discussion with her boss as a collaborative “let’s put our heads together” exercise and that she can set the stage by noting that the company must be willing to let go of some of the tasks since they laid those people off.
But several of the posts above come across as if it’s perfectly fine, right after a layoff, to tell your boss unilaterally that you’re only doing 20% of the tasks, that you’re only working 40 hours and hey, can I have a raise? That stance simply isn’t realistic.
The former is a professional, collaborative approach. The latter is just as unreasonable as the boss expecting her to work 80 hours. If the boss is a reasonable person, the first approach is likely to make the best of a bad situation. If not, none of this really matters and Mathilda needs to leave, either for her new venture or a stopgap job.
Rick:
I don’t get your comment… you’re ridiculing previous comments and then suggesting the same courses of action but using different words. How is “talk to your boss about what can slide” different than letting your boss work with you to prioritize tasks so that you end up doing the 20% that probably matters? The level of assertiveness or the exact percentage may be up for discussion, but you’re essentially suggesting the same thing and not adding anything new to the conversation, other than condescending comments to others who commented before you.
A lot of these are unrealistic.
“write down all the tasks and projects of the three jobs, prioritize, and cut 80% of them. Do only the 20% that really matters. Assuming that your boss is not unreasonable, let him/her participate in the prioritization exercise.”
Um, there’s just been a layoff and she’s going to arbitrarily decided what she’ll do at work and MAYBE let her boss in on it? Not only is that massively insubordinate, it’s just silly as are the other comments along that line and the ones saying she should ask for a raise, etc. Get this through you heads folks… 25 people in this place just lost their jobs, the economy sucks and she can’t just not work. So, if Mathilda is going to stay at the company, she can’t start asking for a raise (right after layoffs??) and imperiously informing her boss of what work she’ll be willing to do. That’s not workable.
As I said above, some of the work has been implicitly de-prioritized…. so talk to your boss about what can slide (“since we let Kathy and Ron go it’s obvious some of the work wasn’t needed, but some probably is… here’s my take. I want to make sure I’m focusing on the right stuff… can we talk?”)
Now, this works if the boss is a reasonable person they probably hated letting people go and know it’s unreasonable for her to do all of the tasks from 3 jobs. So this should work. If the boss is a jerk and idiot, it won’t. In that case I’d either suck it up for a month or two and look to get your venture off the ground ASAP or I’d look for another job as a stopgap, even if it’s temp or something.
First, write down all the tasks and projects of the three jobs, prioritize, and cut 80% of them. Do only the 20% that really matters. Assuming that your boss is not unreasonable, let him/her participate in the prioritization exercise. Then, make it a point to work no more than 45 hours a week, at the most. Work expands to fill the available time, so if you decide to work 80 hours a week, guess what: you will be working 80 hours a week. Be firm on this. Your boss probably already got rid of all the people he could afford to let go, so he needs you to stay. Use that to your advantage.
Hi Mathilda (and Pam),
Seems safe to say they’re not paying you 3 persons’ salaries, correct? Then perhaps you can bargain for some non-monetary perks, such as:
* A telecommuting option that allows you to work from home and get some basic life/household chores done while also holding down the job tasks;
* a flex-time option that gives you a non-vacation day off every couple weeks, so you can not only recharge your batteries, but spend time on your ESCAPE;
* longer lunch breaks so you can go to the gym, take a nap, run errands, make ESCAPE calls, or do whatever you need to do to restore some energy for the rest of your long work days;
* however many extra sick days or vacation days you can wrangle to use for ESCAPE plotting or to whine in person to the SO 😉 .
And if that all fails, I second what everyone else has said about reminding yourself that there IS light at the end of the tunnel, that this period CANNOT last forever, and that you are in charge of your own destiny! (Which, given that you solicit Pam Slim for advice, shows you have the smarts and gumption to make it happen).
Good fortune to you!
Julia
Hi Mathilda,
Oh I feel for you! Feeling stuck, scared and exhausted (and seeing more of each headed your way!) is an awful place to be. I’m not going to tell you what do about the job — because I truly think you know what’s best for you — and I mean that in a “I trust in you and your ability to take care of yourself way,” not in a “condescending, I can’t tell you what to do” way. *smile* (Plus all these other really smart people have already given lots of great suggestions.)
Here’s advice I will offer.
1. Eat a raw fruit or vegetable at least once every day.
2. Brush your teeth two (or more) times a day.
3. Drink water often.
4. Set a bed time that ensures you get your optimum number of hours of sleep a night.
5. Put exercise (back) into your routine. When we’re tired and stressed we need it even more. A yoga class? Dance class? I’d suggest something to get you out of your head and into your body.
6. Take your vitamins (esp. B vitamins).
7. Take your lunch break away from your desk. (Oh and more important, take your lunch break! *smile*)
8. Make it against your rules to take work home. (And if some loopholes are necessary, know in advance what situations are exceptions to this rule.)
9. Be kind to (and patient with) yourself.
Hoping you get what you want and need,
singingly,
sg
.-= Sarah M. Greer´s last blog ..Bringing Singing Back =-.
This is a tough problem, but at the same time, there are many people who don’t have jobs who would gladly taken on the impossible task. I think that like anything in life, if you can see this as an opportunity, you could really get a great deal out of it. For example, one thing I recommend is installing an application life Slife, to see how you are spending your time. Then you can start to eliminate inefficiencies.
REAd the 4 hour Workweek if you haven’t. There’s probably a bunch of things you can offload to a virtual assistant. Another thing is if you do an awesome job, then you are going to in a powerful bargaining position later on.
Obviously, the other commenters have made some great points about figuring out if this company is worth it or not.
.-= Srinivas Rao´s last blog ..Filter your reality through empowering beliefs =-.
Pam – you’re a wizard. Mathilda is lucky to have you.
Mathilda, my dear, my hat is off to you for keeping your focus and soldiering on, looking for practical answers.
My strategic advice is always directed toward the individual’s bottom line because when a crisis raises its ugly head, debate that centers around ideal outcomes is a waste of time.
We get 168 hours in each and every 7-day week. The only person who can decide how many of those hours you’re paid for by someone else that you invest in your personal ESCAPE is you.
Just as your best customer is your existing customer, your best job is the one that currently pays you. However, an existing customer who makes unreasonable demands is a liability – as soon as you can you want to find a better customer and a better job that represents a better ROI to you.
If the job pays the same while demanding more of your talent and time, your employer has effectively demoted you. If other people have been demoted right out the door, the chance is good that – having demoted you already – your employer is already weighing the benefit of doing business without you.
What we cannot afford in times of crisis is the ‘what if’ luxury to editorialize, brainstorm and synthesize. When we find ourselves in the middle of a grass fire, we don’t have time to be choosy about the music or the tap shoes – we have to dance as fast as we can, for as long as we can until the fire is under control.
If you think your position is impossible, your manager’s job has got to be an absolute living hell. You can talk all you want about fairness and roles and responsibilities – but the likelihood is that his/her hands are even more thoroughly tied than yours.
When we’re pushed to the wall, we need all our energies to make our 168-hour weeks work best for us. When we have a dream that we are building, we need all our creative talents working at maximum warp to make the dream come true.
Energy is your best weapon against stress and your best tool in growing your new biz. Take 20 minutes the first chance you get to look at your 168-hour week and figure out (daily) how much time you spend on everything you do. If the job is currently taking 80 hours, for instance, it’s currently subsidizing the 88 hours you have left to devote to you. Now is the time to make priority decisions to make those 88 hours work brilliantly for you.
Give yourself 6 hours to sleep at night. That’s 42 hours a week. You’ve got 46 hours left to devote to you. Spend 5 hours a day on all the things that absolutely need doing – eating, cleaning, commuting, shopping – that’s 35 hours. You have 11 hours left to devote to you each week – 11 quality hours to renew your energy, revitalize your ideas and build momentum for your ESCAPE!
The 20 minutes I’ve suggested you spend now should focus exclusively on defining the steps you need to take to make that ESCAPE dream a reality – just 20 minutes of your daily 94 minute allotment. (11 hours divided by 7 days, that is)
And remember that those 94 minutes are subsidized – that the employer who is driving you crazy is actually paying you to plan and execute your escape! Well done, Mathilda!
Good luck on your journey!
Abby Hagyard
aka Scarlettmots from Twitter
Now What? Strategies
You have to decide about the future of the company. You are smart, make a judgement. Is it better to be there or be somewhere else? Is there a some where else, realistically?
Only you can make that decision. Get the most accurate information that you can , and then go with it.
If that sounds overly simple………………………..ok, but don’t over complicate it either.
Some will say go with your heart. Go with your brain , and the heart will have to adjust………..and it will.
My first comment here. I’m a fan Pamela – thanks for all you do.
Mathilda, my advice would be to see what you can outsource. I didn’t see anyone talking about this, but hiring a temporary virtual assistant can be super cheap and take a lot of these things off of your plate. You might use a VA for repetitive tasks that go along with your exit strategy, or engage a VA to do some of the mundane tasks that your company has you doing.
Good luck!
Hey Y’all!
WOW, what great support and suggestions! I really appreciate your help and perspectives. Here is “Mathilda’s” response to your input so far:
—
First of all, my undying thanks to Pam for including my current situation in an open source coaching post. Since you’re here and reading this, you likely know that Pam is fantastic, kind, smart, witty, and talented, but in case you’re unsure of this, trust me; Pam is fantastic, kind, smart, witty, and talented!
Secondly, thank you kindly to everyone for the thoughts, advice, input, and ideas. It’s amazing to me how very much power and wisdom can be harnessed in some specifically-arranged 1s and 0s. 🙂
Giving advice/counsel in this situation is tough because you all don’t have all of the information. That said, you have collectively given me some excellent ideas. Again, you have my tremendous thanks.
I’m working to arrange things so that I can get the “absolute must-do” things done at work, while reserving as much energy as possible for my ESCAPE plan. (And just fyi, the ESCAPE plan has been in process for a couple of months now; this is definitely a TO plan; not a FROM plan.)
I wish my SO was around, but alas, the SO’s work is hours away for the next month. Such is the life of an artist! 🙂 Still, the telephone works, and I’m quite good at whining via email. (kidding; I try not to whine too much!)
I welcome any additional ideas/thoughts anyone has, but I did want to pop up to say thank you for all of the tremendous thinking shared thus far.
Thank you!
As long as employees continue to accept the outrageous demands that are being placed on them, this kind of abuse will continue to happen.
What are the actual chances that you will be fired if you refuse to shoulder two other peoples’ jobs and 60-80 hour workweeks? I’d guess slim to nil. You’re obviously valuable and can multitask and do many things well, or you’d be getting a pink slip, too. (Lots of people are getting laid off who are equally capable, I’m sure, but there must be something extra special about you that employers want to hold onto. Is it because you’re a doormat or because you’re a dynamo and, as such, an emormous asset? This is your big chance to find out!)
Get a note from your doctor reminding your employer that a 40 hour work week is all that a person should be legitimately expected to handle without becoming overloaded emotionally, mentally and physically. Contact the Bureau of Labor and find out what employers can legitimately demand of the employees in your classification.
If you’re all that valuable to them (and you’re still there, aren’t you? so the answer it a resounding YES!) , and you WANT TO shoulder the burden, go for it — but negotiate a higher salary! Say you understand the bind they’re in but that the added burden is going to cause you not only extra days of work but sleepless nights as well — and let them know what the new demands are worth to your world, in dollars and cents. (To the penny, plus 10%. That way you can negotiate a little and still come out feeling pretty good about the deal.)
If you don’t take care of yourself in this abusive/demanding business climate, I have bad news: no one else will, and your health, equanimity, and loved ones will be the losers. (Which of the three do you want to lose? All three are at risk! What’s THAT worth to you?) If you’re agreeable to taking on the extra burden, get ‘em to pay for it what it’s worth to you in lost free time and lost sleep! Otherwise, say NO. As in NO. You know, NO!
I can say this because I’m self-employed doing what I love, and have never been happier. Funds are tight but when I work overtime it’s all for ME, and I get to choose whether to shoulder a burden or push a deadline out.
You aren’t a slave. Help your employer get over him- or herself. They never will otherwise.
I’m not a career counselor, or a mental health counselor. I’m just a fellow worker who thinks anyone expected to continue to work under conditions such as the ones documented above needs to consult a career counselor, a mental health counselor, and their doctor to garner some serious support in the halls of power about how to maintain a work-life balance that protects the workerbees. Any employer who abuses his or her dominion over a workplace should be held accountable and should be “dialed back” by people in positions to push back, as employees themselves so often feel powerless to do without risking the loss of their jobs.
As long as employees continue to accept the outrageous demands that are being placed on them, this kind of abuse will continue to happen.
What are the actual chances that you will be fired if you refuse to shoulder two other peoples’ jobs and 60-80 hour workweeks? I’d guess slim to nil. You’re obviously valuable and can multitask and do many things well, or you’d be getting a pink slip, too. (Lots of people are getting laid off who are equally capable, I’m sure, but there must be something extra special about you that employers want to hold onto. Is it because you’re a doormat or because you’re a dynamo and, as such, an emormous asset? This is your big chance to find out!)
Get a note from your doctor reminding your employer that a 40 hour work week is all that a person should be legitimately expected to handle without becoming overloaded emotionally, mentally and physically. Contact the Bureau of Labor and find out what employers can legitimately demand of the employees in your classification.
If you’re all that valuable to them (and you’re still there, aren’t you? so the answer it a resounding YES!) , and you WANT TO shoulder the burden, go or it — but negotiate a higher salary! Say you understand the bind they’re in but that the added burden is going to cause you not only extra days of work but sleepless nights as well — and let them know what the new demands are worth to your world, in dollars and cents. (To the penny, plus 10%. That way you can negotiate a little and still come out feeling pretty good about the deal.)
If you don’t take care of yourself in this abusive/demanding business climate, I have bad news: no one else will, and your health, equanimity, and loved ones will be the losers. (Which of the three do you want to lose? All three are at risk! What’s THAT worth to you?) If you’re agreeable to taking on the extra burden, get ’em to pay for it what it’s worth to you in lost free time and lost sleep! Otherwise, say NO. As in NO. You know, NO!
I can say this because I’m self-employed doing what I love, and have never been happier. Funds are tight but when I work overtime it’s all for ME, and I get to choose whether to shoulder a burden or push a deadline out.
You aren’t a slave. Help your employer get over him- or herself. They never will otherwise.
I’m not a career counselor, or a mental health counselor. I’m just a fellow worker who thinks anyone expected to continue to work under conditions such as the ones documented above needs to consult a career counselor, a mental health counselor, and their doctor to garner some serious support in the halls of power about how to maintain a work-life balance that protects the workerbees. Any employer who abuses his or her dominion over a workplace should be held accountable and should be “dialed back” by people in positions to push back, as employees themselves so often feel powerless to do without risking the loss of their jobs.
I was in Mathilda’s shoes just 7 months ago, taking on new responsibilities (in addition to my current ones) after a massive layoff right before Thanksgiving.
Please do NOT make the mistake of assuming, as I have seen in some of these posts, that you are somehow more “valuable” than those who were just let go.
Because what happened to me can happen to you… you bust a**, work long hours, do 2+ jobs, do work that is mission-critical (e.g. avoiding fines from regulatory agencies), get along w/ your manager and coworkers, and then the next round of layoffs hit — and you’re the one walked out the door (as I was just a month ago).
IMHO, we’ve got to get rid of this mentality that surviving a layoff somehow confers the status of “star worker”-hood. Nonsense! What about the next round of layoffs? Do not think for a moment that you are safe just because you survived this layoff, or because you have enough work to do to fill the entire 168 hrs in the week.
Francine is right on: detach emotionally!! You cannot do it all, and your a**-busting, people-pleasing ways may not save you anyway. So have your boss help you prioritize the mission-critical stuff, and spend those extra 20 hours/week focusing on finding your next job, entrepreneurial effort, etc.
I’ll followup on Shaikovski and others.
First of all, you’re probably considered the best of all your ex-co-workers. Be pride!
Next, you need to keep the head above water. For this, *Pareto rules*. Which means, concentrate on the 20% few that give 80% of the value to your management and (internal)customers. As stated before, you can hardly be blamed for not doing all that needs/should be done. Donig the maths: 3 (jobs)x20%=60% which lets you 40% of your time for other things 😉
Other advice: expect others to do *their* work as well. Refuse any uncomplete or not 100% quality work in input: send deficient work back to emitter for correction. If you do correct that work yourself, you’re doing someone else’s work (like you need this now!) but meanwhile, nobody’s going to do yours.
Act quickly : do that 20% of the work, send it as a probe to your contacts to check if it’s ok. While waiting for their answers, do something else. As there have been some downsizing, chances are that others are as overloaded as you. Exploit this.
Last advice: take some time to think to the top 3 priorities of your jobs and the company/department in which you are. With the crisis, some things are not as important as they used to be and may be just dropped. That can ease your work by selecting only what’s important now and either drop the rest or defer it for later. Anything not aligned with the top 3 priorities won’t be done now.
For you personally: take time to invest in a personal time management method like GTD (my 1st choice), Autofocus, etc. That could change your life and may be the tool that will ensure you get things done for your own entrepreneurial dream as well.
Don’t step back: fight!
(Too late for me, too many posts! I have to make it short 🙂
– It’s time for DESIGN TO COST and INNOVATION: what is expected is that you find new ways to do alone what was done by three people. Obviously, it’s not only a concatenation. Step back and find new ways.
– IT’S A CHANCE ! ! : you are so overloaded that nobody will blame you for not achieving your work!
– Don’t do what you have to do, but what you WANT to do (especially if it helps or train you for your next job :p )
– On the 3 jobs, what REALLY creates customer value? Don’t do the boring documents, reports or whatever that nobody read or use.
To go more in deep, details about these 3 positions would help (supporting functions, operations, dev, sales…)
Hope it helps :p
(it feels weird to give guru-like advices – thkx Pam for the opportunity)
1. Determine the 2-3 main job responsibilities that prevented Mathilda from getting the ax (ie. the 20% of activites that result in 80% of the results.)
2. Ask Mathilda’s boss if she can spend 40 hours per week on these activites and find someone else to do the rest. IF NOT, threaten to leave to see how much the company values keeping her.
3. Ask the voice in Mathilda’s head: WHAT IS PERFECTION?
Andrew Parkes’s last blog post..5 Battering Rams to CRASH through DREAM WALLS
Well I’d say to Mathilda is “follow the technique of offloading your work”. No not your three fulltime jobs combined in one, but your new venture! If I had a bit more info about your three full-time jobs put together then I could’ve helped further.
I am currently writing this comment in the same “cubiclish” environment that Mathilda is in which takes 9 hours out of my day plus another 2 and half hours of travel. This totals to around a minimum of 60 hours a week of lost time (on a quiet week that is). I too am in the midst of starting my new venture and I found it difficult to handle both. I then decided to look for a Virtual Assistant (VA.) I found one for a solid $4.5US an hour which is a bargain by any means. For $180 a month I can get 40 hours of pure work dedicated to my venture. The only thing the VA needs is a direction. This is where your bit comes. Draft out packets of work and “offload” it to the VA. Slowly but surely the VA will prove to be a valuable asset that will alleviate a tremendous amount of pressure. These packets of work could be drafted on your lunch break, on the way to work or at home. All it takes is a bit of investment from your end for a good output result from the VA.
You can even offload your packets of work to other friends or relatives. Just make sure you break down the work or else you’ll scare them off and more critically yourself from the mammoth lumped task that is ahead of you. All the best! (;
I feel for Mathilda and her situation, but I have always felt that ESCAPE is not a good reason to start a business. When you start a business, hopefully you will running toward a vision of your future, and not running away…because it’s only a matter of time until you can’t run fast enough to get away from yourself. I’ve written a lot about this running away/toward idea at e2ecoaching.com. Great discussion!
As others have already said, you are faced with a tough situation and there are no easy answers.
Here is something you just learned about the folks you work for: They don’t give a damn about you! Do you really want to spend any more time than you have to working for these idiots?
You need to get out the right way, but get out as soon as possible. The longer you stay, the longer you collude with their mistreatment of you and the other folks you work with. It will be easier to find rationalization to stay and cope than it will be to find the courage to professionally bid them farewell (kiss my ass!).
Realize that while you persue your entrepreneurial dream (which I applaud!) you may have to spend time working for others. Choose these new relationships with great care. Find good folks to work for, and learn as much as you can from them with the purpose of being better when you are running your own show.
Come to terms with the fact that there is a reason why you did not forsee that the folks you currently work for would turn out to be assholes. Unless you uncover and address that reason, it will happen again. This is going to take some tough soul searching on our part. Reach out to folks you love and trust and let them help you with this.
Above all, be encouraged! You can and will survive this, and you can move on to thrive and help others to do the same.
Best to you,
Bret
Bret Simmons’s last blog post..The Service-Profit Chain
And if you start to stress and think you have no one in your corner… ahem.
Wow. I started to read all of the comments, but…
I like what Alan Dayley said. Do some tweaking to get through the crazy situation where you are now, and then get out ASAP!
Stop getting down on yourself about perfectionism and fear of failure. Just stop it. You don’t have time for that crap. Do what needs to be done for your new venture, and make it messy and imperfect, but do it! Notice I didn’t say “don’t worry if it is messy and imperfect” I said “make it messy and imperfect”. That is what is required.
First piece of advice: detach. I mean detach from the job, emotionally and mentally. The best way to do that is to start your new venture in your spare time, and spend all your leisure time planning it, so you get excited about it. Tell someone about it, and perhaps enlist a partner. Move on emotionally, because you will end up having to move on eventually anyway — no matter what happens.
One you move on emotionally, disengage from the job and engage in the future, you will be better off. Or you could do what I did: quit your job, go home to your husband and tell him you have quit your job, and force your business into being:-) I did that in 1980 and haven’t starved. Few people in American starve physically. But too many starve emotionally.
I agree with all the comments above about prioritizing, planning and culling but would add don’t forget your significant other. Mathilda didn’t how long and how far away her SO is but she should talk with him/her. SO will support her escape and may even see opportunities and solutions that Mathilda – buried in 3 jobs – hasn’t seen. Who knows SO may want to escape with Mathilda!
One thing to use as background for talks with your manager is that the organization has, by laying off people, said that what they were doing isn’t worth paying for. Maybe some of it is… but not all of it. That should mean that you can’t be expected to do everything they did – so what parts can drop (i.e. weren’t worth paying someone else to do leading to the layoff?).
Second, come in with solutions. For example, if her direct report was doing things that can be outsourced inexpensively propose that (note that you might be able to outsource some of this to the laid off person).
Finally, think creatively. This situation seems very hard because she can’t just quit, she can’t rely on her new venture and so it’s a catch-22. Or is it? Could she take another job, even something paying less like retail (presuming that pays less) but that’s a straight 40 hour a week job that involves less stress? This could give her more time to work on her new venture.
As many have stated – this is a very difficult situation to be in. I know from time to time – I have had this happen to me or around me.
The advice that I would share is
1. Have the end in mind – and work towards your ultimate goals. The internal voice is important – that will keep you honest in the end. Somehow you will have to redirect it to being more productive. Sounds easy. Working toward your end goal is what is going to keep you going. Don’t put it on hold, slow it down some, but never stop.
2. The work situation – much of the advice around getting stuff done and prioritizing is completely spot on. You can only do so much! Put that list together, sit down with your manager and show said manager the list – this is what you signed me up for. What is really important? Here is what I am going to do… Here is what is if I get some time… Here is the stuff that just is not going to happen.. Both sides agree – and move forward.
3. At the end of the day – I would also have that discussion around the unreasonable request… you let go of two folks – and now I get to work 80 hours… I would like to help out as much as humanly possible, but that is asking too much. The manager needs to understand that you are a team player and willing to do pretty much as you can, boundaries have to be set. Set them for the manager. I bet silence comes from the other end.
When I have been confronted with this situation – it usually ends. Not sure how fast for you, but it will pass. Keep your focus on your end goals, on the important tasks and remember to take care of yourself. No one else is going to do that last one.
I’m going to 2nd (or 3rd?) Tim and Michele here.
Although, I’ve seen plenty of organizations where those at the top didn’t work 80 work weeks. The problem was they’d been promoted because they were good at their last job (or just outlasted everyone around them), but had no idea how to manage. So when asked to prioritize, they couldn’t. They’d just respond with “it all has to get done.” Thus, those in the middle ended up working those hours while watching their boss take off at 5.
Regardless of whether it’s due to people at the top working 80 hour weeks themselves – or not – it happens in a lot of companies. And a lot of those companies have survived a long, long time.
(By the way, I love Jennifer’s take on the work she did not having to be perfect in the long run too.)
The thing is, if you start working 60-80 hours a week, you’ll set a precedent. When you attempt to return to ‘normal’ hours, it will be perceived as slacking. So just don’t start it.
If all this can’t be helped and there is no way for this particular job to support you in moving on to running your own business, find another full time job.
There are more options than we often see when first looking at a situation.
It may take some time, but there are options and it is possible.
All the best!
deb
Deb Owen’s last blog post..i’m good enough, i’m smart enough, and gosh-darnit – people like me (what’s wrong with affirmations)
I second the “boundaries” advice. It has never failed me. In fact, stating my boundaries has usually brought me respect.
A stark example: During one hellacious project, I told my managers that I refused to work 7 day weeks. Six, temporarily, OK. But not 7. The project’s star employee, who did work 7 days a week for several weeks in a row died of a heart attack soon after the project ended. At 34 years old.
My punishment? I got a bonus of only $1500 as compared to the $5000 some other people got. My supervisor was even apologetic!
Barbara Saunders’s last blog post..Paying Forward Some Great Advice
Flashbacks! I was there 7 months ago.
Good news! You will be looking at this in your rear view mirror soon too! Keep the future in your sights.
A couple of weeks after I left my corporate position, the company imploded. Lesson learned: The tasks that I tried to do perfectly before I left no longer mattered. The work itself (the spreadsheets and presentations) had no value. What did (and still does) have value is that I left the same way I worked… caring that I did my personal best… and that I made life easier for those I worked with.
Take a few minutes and envision how you would like to exit. What feelings do you want to take with you? What legacy do you want to leave with your fellow co-workers? (Not the company itself… but the people. The company, literally, might not exist down the road. Your relationship with yourself and others will.)
After this… take some serious time to list out what you’d like to accomplish. Include all 3 jobs… plus your personal stuff. Prioritize it based on your internal compass and how you want to feel when you leave. How would you like to find the job if you were the new person taking your place? Would it be better to leave a project ready to be started rather than half done so that someone doesn’t have to backtrack and figure out what you did?
Do this by yourself first. Then, holding the personal stuff aside, let your boss help. I was not one to ask for much help… but asking my boss to help prioritize the work took a huge load off of my “There’s just too much to do” thoughts. I also found that I was expecting far more out of myself than he was.
This might help you get to the “brilliant feeling of lightness, excitement and sheer relief” point Tim Brownson mentions above. Freedom comes with this visualization… and the work all take on future focused meaning with purpose and no hard feelings. The job itself becomes a simply a means to finance your new venture and hone your time management skills. Freedom.
Jennifer Voss’s last blog post..When Your Essential Self Speaks – Do Nothing
I agree wholeheartedly with those who suggest working out a list of priorities with the manager. My guess/hope is that the manager would view this as a supportive move on Mathilda’s part.
I second Tim Brownson’s motion to be kind to your perfectionist voice. During these times, the more you try to stuff it, the louder and more insistent it will become. Perfectionism is part of who you are and, I imagine, serves you well in many ways. Earlier, I suggested “embracing” that voice. Give it kind attention and it won’t try to take over as it would if you tried to ignore it. Instead, it will become one of many strengths you will draw on over these next weeks and months.
I agree on the triage, prioritize and eliminate approach. One other area to focus on is your home finances; when we say we can’t leave a job it usually boils down to financial (over) commitments. If you had no debt and 3 to 6 months of living expenses in a money market account, you could look your boss in the eye and simply say “No.” So, your at home goal should be to get into a financial situation that allows that freedom. The “triage, prioritize and eliminate” method works here.
Triage: what can just not survive given your goals? This year’s vacation?
Prioritize: Food, utilities, shelter, health insurance, life insurance , transportation
Eliminate: Do you really need the car(s) you have? Could a good older car do as well? Meals out? Smoking? Drinking? Health club memberships? (running is free!)
How focused are you and your S.O. willing to get?
“Blow, wind! Come, wrack! At least we’ll die with the harness off our back!” (Misquote of Macbeth from The Postman)
I’m going to chime in here and support Tim — I worked at the White House and 20 hour days were not unusual from time to time. Of course, I loved my work so it was invigorating. Some organizations demand a lot of time from their folks because it’s the corporate culture and some folks totally dig working that way. That is fine. For them.
One thing I neglected to put in my post above is an important point — she needs to set expectations about exactly how available she’s going to allow herself to be. If everyone is in a panic she can join them, or she can remain a calm, collected eye in the storm, and get her work done and plug away at her own deal.
If she’s 100% available, she will be 100% taken advantage of. (which is a lousy way to end a sentence, but there you have it.)
Michele Woodward’s last blog post..To Know, Know, Know You
@ Alan “Any business that piles the work of three people on an employee and tells them to work 80 hours is not on a survival path.”
I have to say bud that is totally unrealistic if modern history is anything to go by. I have worked in 3 Fortune 500 companies, ALL of which expected that from many of its employees and have done for 25 years +. The problem stems from the fact that 80 hours and more is often the norm for senior execs and that gets passed down.
It was the main reason I left Corporate UK because I’d had enough of spending 20 years fighting it. Since being in the US it seems even more magnified here.
I like the sentiment and it would be lovely to think people would just refuse and move on as the evil corporations collapse around the greedy ears without willing labor. However, they know even in a booming economy, there are always more people looking for vacancies than there are openings.
Will this ever change? I sure hope so and it may well do, but I have my doubts in the short-term because I’ve been hearing this since the recession in the 80’s.
We have limited ability to change our employers (doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try), but we have total ability to how we react to situations and how much we allow them to influence how we feel.
Tim Brownson’s last blog post..What Is Hypnosis?
I’m betting the rats have left the ship, cargo is being thrown overboard, and waves are starting to lap the deck. So, if Mathilda can’t be without a job, her greatest priority is to find another or get her business launched. Her second greatest priority is to pay off debt as fast as she can and prepare to live on less so she doesn’t have to be as picky about where she goes.
At work, she will need to ruthlessly apply the Pareto Principle (only the most beneficial parts of things get done) and, since she tends to perfectionism, keep repeating that “anything worth doing is worth doing badly” or in other words, a lick and a promise are better than nothing. Once a day, or sometimes twice, she’ll have to slay her inner perfectionist.
Now the good news. She is loosing a lot of keeping up-to-date, staying-in-the-loop time from her calendar. Further, many times she and these other people were in the same place attending meetings, etc. Those times will not be added to her work load. (I once lost an intern, and when I did the math, I realized I was only getting about 15 hours per week of independent work out of him and we could live without some of it. I hardly missed him. ) So 60-70 hours a week may be enough to get the need-it-to-survive stuff done.
There are no simple answers here and unfortunately it is the situation many are currently facing.
I will suggest you engage the situation using the same guidelines the organization management is using to make current decisions. They are making cuts to make up for lost revenues. Not enough money is coming in to support all employees. The organization has to adjust to operate with less. Just like the organizations, you only will be able to do so much due to lack of support and resources. You have to cut on non critical projects and concentrate on only the projects you have enough time and resources to accomplish. The suggestions from many here, asking you to work with your manager to identify what are critical projects and to communicate what you can realistically get done is great advice.
I wish you the best,
Ivan
Deb’s ideas are great. I’m not so much for ideas on finding time to do your own biz, since I struggle with time mgmt myself, but I do have some ideas for coping with your current work situation.
You definitely need to keep a giant list of all things you are doing, both for you to keep all your stuff in order AND to help you out in showing the upper mgmt all the work you’re doing. I agree that the whole “doing 3 jobs” idea is both unrealistic and incredibly daunting for you. Instead, it should be like: I am the one person to cover these parts of the business, what is the most important thing I can do with my time.
I would -absolutely- insist on a raise. Unless you were way way overpaid, you probably accepted a market salary for a regular 40 hours workweek. You -deserve- more in order to do this. I would NOT worry about getting the axe, because it sounds like they’ve already lost a bunch of knowledge. Also, imagine if you found another standard 40-hour job AND worked another 20-hour job part-time, you’d definitely make more than what you make now, right?
In fact, I haven’t seen average salaries drop too much even in the down-turn, so they would probably NOT be able to find someone else willing to work a 60-80 hour workweek for what you’re making now. The extra money will at least partly make up for your time, and if you’re really disciplined, you could even stash the extra away in a savings account for a time when you finally cut the cord.
It doesn’t sound like this place has much respect for you guys, so I don’t anticipate any of this being -particularly- appealing. However, in the spirit of making the best of things, this is definitely the time to leverage your power from a career standpoint. Any processes or venues or vendors or products or anything that you’ve always thought were a waste of time? Cancel them! Too many bottlenecks here or there? Bust them!
The thing about increased responsibility (even horribly over-resposibility like in your case) is that always comes with increased power. It might not seem like a worthwhile trade-off to you, but it’s what you’re stuck with for the moment. So if you -just- struggle and work harder and barely keep your head above water with all the work, then you’ll most like 1) get burned out and 2) be stuck in the same sucky situation if the company starts making money again and hires new people. Instead, if you say, fine I’ll do this but I’ll do it my way (and what choice do they have, really), then you can change the entire game.
Plus, you’ll be the go-to gal when hiring time comes around, and possibly end up at the top of the food chain, rather than the bottom. That may not seem important if you’re plotting your escape, but for me, it’s all about choices. And while you’re working there, you want to a) keep it fair (by asking for a deserved raise) and b) take challenges like opportunities (to actually get something out of all your hard work!)
Do you want to get your venture off the ground or do you want to deal with your current situation better?
It’s almost certainly going to be a combination of both, right?
Of course not surprisingly you want out and you want to avoid feeling exploited, but that may have to hold off for a little while whilst you get things set up.
Firstly, don’t kill the voice, this is really important, because it’s your unconscious and we need it alive for all of this stuff. In fact, thank it for trying to help you up to now. It has you best interests at heart even if it doesn’t always seem like that. So go easy on it/you.
Next time you get it. Thank it for the input and ask if it can think of any alternatives that may help you out in the short-term that are slightly less perfectionist. Assure it that you can go back to being like that whenever you chose if it doesn’t pan out as you both want.
You can if you like change the voice and make it more supportive by playing about with the pitch, tone, volume etc. It’s your head and you have dominion in there to do whatever you want.
Have you ever known you were leaving a job you didn’t like before anybody else did? Do you remember that brilliant feeling of lightness, excitement and sheer relief?
If not, you can imagine it now. See what you would see and hear what you would hear handing your notice in, and then feel what it would feel like to you.
If you knew that was definitely going to happen in 6 months, would you be cool with that? How about 12 months, if it were a sure thing, could you hold on that long? I know you could because it’s a better future waiting for you. It’s just that damn uncertainty that bugs us all, right?
But it is certain, you’re not going to be there in 25 years right? So it’s just a time frame we’re dealing with.
You can adopt those feelings of leaving now if you want them. Unrealistic? I dunno, but probably no more unrealistic than torturing yourself. Each day you can start work knowing for a FACT you are one day nearer leaving and doing what you really want to do. Isn’t that going to make it easier when you look around at all the other poor souls that don’t know that?
Not only that, but it’s less likely to sap your energy, so that you can focus something on your new venture. If you expend too much time feeling manic and full of angst you’ll wear yourself out.
The alternative is to murder your boss and everybody else in the company, claim you were the sole survivor of a bunch of machete wielding homicidal clowns and then sell your story to The Globe. That has it’s plus points, but technically I think it’s illegal in most States.
Tim Brownson’s last blog post..What Is Hypnosis?
Tough situation! Very tough.
– List all the projects and their tasks that need attention for the three positions she now fills.
– List them on sticky notes or index cards, one task per card.
– Sit down with the manager to put them in priority order.
– Work on them in priority order, no more than 5 in process at once.
– Enforce this by calling for a re-prioritization when some new task comes in. Eample: “Yes, I can do that right away. Which of these other 5 tasks do you want me to stop working on to do this new one?”
– Adjust the list and priority daily or every time something new comes up.
– At least once a week go over the priority again with the manager.
– Work as many hours as you can without reaching total burn-out. Then stop.
– Learn to say no and say it often. And make sure you deliver on the things you agree to do. This balances the “no” answers against a reputation of accomplishment.
– Leave (i.e. quit) as soon as possible. Really. Any business that piles the work of three people on an employee and tells them to work 80 hours is not on a survival path.
Alan Dayley’s last blog post..Losing My “Champion Skeptic”
I feel Mathilda’s pain. This situation stinks. But she can make it better. First, she needs to look closely at all three jobs and divide the tasks up into “Must Have” and “Nice To Have.” It’s important that Little Miss Perfectionist sits in the corner during this part of the process, or else EVERYTHING will be “Must have” – funny how that happens, isn’t it? When she gets a good list of the key, vital tasks for each job, she needs to go to the supervisor and say, “I realize I will be working a lot of hours, but to be most effective I will need to focus on getting these things done first. Do you agree?” If the boss thinks something is missing or one of Mathilda’s “Nice To Have’s” is really a “Must Have”, then Mathilda needs to adjust her list accordingly. But what she’s aiming for is an agreement with the boss on what absolutely, positively needs to be done. Mathilda may have to be assertive here and set some boundaries from the outset, while being a pro and a team player. Focus on words and statements that show what she’s able to do, rather than what’s not possible.
Then she needs to attend to what I call “The Big Chunks” — her “Must Haves” and let the little chunks go.
And, one more thing, she needs to not care so much. I’m not saying be a slacker (although perfectionists can hear it that way). What I’m saying is: she should do what’s in her power to do, and do that well, all the while accepting that one person cannot possibly do three jobs perfectly. But one person can do parts of three jobs pretty well. Aim for that, save time for self, and ride the bucking bronco thru until the economy improves.
Michele Woodward’s last blog post..To Know, Know, Know You
Wow! That’s a seriously tough situation to be in. First, I’d say…..know that you’re not alone. There are a ton of people going through similar circumstances and frustrations right now.
Next, unfortunately, prepare yourself to be in a period of transition for a while. Find info you can on managing change and what to expect. (Things will probably be tumultuous for a brief time.)
Then….I’d say…..go back to the manager again.
But rather than talk in generalities such as “three full time jobs”…go with a list of the responsibilities of all those positions, and ask the manager to prioritize them.
Don’t talk about hours at this point. (The manager is probably being held responsible for getting as much done with a smaller workforce and is probably in ‘freak out’ mode at the moment too.)
Then begin to look for ways to streamline those processes on the things that the manager has identified as most important. (Or make recommendations of certain tasks that are redundant or, upon deeper reflection, may not be needed at all.)
Go back to the manager with these recommendations at a later date. (“Hey! I found ways we can save time/money/effort and still get the important things done! How awesome am I?”)
In the meantime, yes. Kill the inner perfectionist. Start putting together your business plan. And design an exit strategy.
And breathe.
Breathe a lot.
It’ll take time, but you can get through this – and get out, if so desired – and come out the other side doing much more gratifying work.
Oh. And do what you did here. Seek out help. Seek out others going through similar circumstances or those who have been through it and made it through. You’ll want people to talk to and to help you out through the process.
Good luck! Keep us all posted!
All the best!
deb
Deb Owen’s last blog post..i’m good enough, i’m smart enough, and gosh-darnit – people like me (what’s wrong with affirmations)
There is no simple answer to this question, obviously, but there are a number of ideas that are important to keep in the forefront:
First, you will not be able to do all 3 jobs perfectly. In fact, you may not even be able to do them well. You will simply have to do what you can. That said, there is a built-in reason for not getting things done well or on-time: it’s not possible to do all 3 jobs as one human being. This is most important for you to understand first.
Second, create your boundaries. Every business will use as much of you as you allow. There is no altruism in business. You are responsible for setting your own boundaries and living to them. You CANNOT be forced to work the hours that they are claiming to expect, and if you are terminated for not working 60-80 hours a week, you’ll have grounds for a wrongful termination lawsuit. Set your own boundaries and respect them.
Third, budget time for your new venture. Decide what your launch target date is, what it will take in terms of your time to get to launch, and create a plan that works backwards from that target. Then, stick to that budget. It’s your most important time. Make sure that you keep the end firmly fixed in your imagination as vividly as you can make it. Hold that future crisply and march towards it according to your plan.
These steps are all equally critical and if you want to get to the end, you have to do them all in that way. It’s not hard once you realize that YOU are the only person who will hold YOUrself accountable to reach your goals. It really is up to you. And most other people will do everything in their power to keep you from those accomplishments. Especially those in your current company who have a vested interest in keeping you right where you are.
Think about it…
Stephen Hultquist
http://infinitesummit.com/
I feel for this person. I bet you anything she’s a good employee because she’s the one they kept AND because she’s clearly taking on a great deal of responsibility for a situation she didn’t create. Someone who steps up and takes ownership this way is a very valuable employee (thus her retention) but the responsibility isn’t serving HER interests. My suggestion would be to make a long list of the responsibilities associated with the three positions and ask her boss to prioritize, with the implicit message being that this is triage – some of it simply won’t get done. This can be a politic way to push responsibility for the situation back where it belongs — with the employer!